Sorry folks, I have so much to write about but stress is not a great mistress when it comes to writing.  All I want to do right now is crawl into a deep hole with a tub of ice cream. 

Daddy is away in Texas and I can’t sleep.  I’m up all evening eating random weird things.  Last night it was a whole package of beets then later it was gluten-free toaster waffles.  It sucks to only have healthy food in the house when you want to binge on crap. 

Daddy and I are going to be living apart for a while. I have no idea how long.  We started looking at houses, lovely houses that dreams are made of.  Now Daddy has an apartment that is only his and I’m stuck here with 4 more years to parent my child, the other love of my life. 

I’m doing my damnedest to be upbeat, to work the problem like I usually would.  Find a way.  But I’m stuck.  Every direction I turn something awful will happen.  

I’ve been so emotional since Saturday.  We played, it was intense and absolutely needed, I’ll tell you about it.  After we played Daddy left for Texas the next day.  I’ve been distraught and trying to keep it together, trying to be my normal positive self.  Not easy. 

At first I thought it was a bad sub drop.  It would have been the first time that happened for me.  But I don’t think that was it.  It is just the reality of our situation settling in.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.  

14 Hours

I’ve posted one item about the weekend I missed writing about but I thought I’d share Mr. D’s thoughts from that weekend as well.  He wrote as I ran off to take care of my life that day.  As I was reading his words it brought back the intensity of that weekend and piqued a couple things I’d like to revisit in writing….fodder for the next couple days.
Last night… in random order…
I take her and use her for my need
Releasing my charge onto her porcelain ass
I clean her and command her to roll over
Securing her wrists in rope shackles
I blindfold her and get out the new toy
The Violet Wand
I tease her everywhere
Using the wand to excite and stimulate her bits
Removing the blindfold she sees the violet light
The electrical discharge to her skin is mesmerizing
She makes gentle noises and I analyze
I shock her nipples and labia
Switching intensities and nearness to her skin
Giggles mingle with ahhhs
I cannot take it any longer…..
I drive deeply into her
Bound to the bed she tries to reach me
But cannot
My cock buried in her sex
I slowly and intensely drive it home
Sweating from the restraint
Lust and abandon in her eyes
Like a lifeline she clutches the rope
She fights the rope for freedom
The rope is a paradox she sees
Suffering and security
Submission and freedom….
Grunting we writhe
Bodies and passions intertwined
Kissing her hard and biting her lip
Claiming her as mine in word and deed
Fucking her body and mind
“I love fucking you Slut”
Blood engorged and rock hard I withdraw
She moans and bites her lip
I push back into her sex
She gasps anew and her eyes glow
“Daddy loves his slutty girl”
She is swollen from 2 days of sex
Lube helps but I am demanding of her
She rises to it, willingly giving me her body
She moans and gasps and grunts and ruts
She is in it to sate my desire and ride the wave
Passion exudes and sex, heady sex, fills the room
“Come in your slut, fill me Daddy” she begs
I laugh, loud and deep
“Oh. No Baby – Daddy isn’t done”
Her whimper is almost noiseless but I hear
She will be sore and feel us for days
Remembering me between her legs when she moves….
Sometime later, I command her to tell me what she wants
Unrelenting I thrust into her and she issues her desire
“Fill me Daddy, please, use me and fill me”
The intensity is overwhelming and I blast off
Filling her and crying out;
She is my muse; my loving slut
This morning….
My hand gripping her throat
We orally grope on the couch
I break to bite her neck below her ear
Then the base and her shoulder
I move to the front of her neck
Licking my way down from the chin
She gasps and tries to lower her head
Daddy is not having it
I gently and forcefully raise it
Continuing to assail her; again she gasps and clenches
I bite her and suckle her throat and she squirms
I am more intrigued and resolve to explore this later…
“On your back” I say
Then I dip my cock into her mouth
Nowhere to go – she takes it
Thrusting and gyrating I fuck her mouth
Holding it deep I feel her gag and shake
She is mine, the power is fascinating
But I relent and she catches her breath
I rise and kiss her hard
I grip the back of her neck
From the nape to the center of her soul
She gasps and her eyes half close
We are one in the inferno we created
Teasing, kissing, necking, and pinching
Alight with desire and lust
We separate and she departs…
I laugh, dark and sinister
She is mine for two more days
Already sore from lovemaking
I imagine the pleasure and pain she will endure
The intensity of my desire is white hot
My need for her, to satiate and mollify her, pushes me
I derive a sense of calm yet chaos in her presence
Intensity like I have never known before…. 
Amazing intensity.