Punishment

The minute I woke up I knew I had failed him.  I felt awful that I had not completed my homework.  On top of knowing I had failed to obey him, I had an extra dirty layer of guilt because I hadn’t wanted to obey in the first place. 

When he texted me, I knew I would have to report my failure. “How was your homework last night?” He asked.

“I fell asleep before I was able to complete it Daddy, I’m so sorry.”

“Well, we’ll talk about that when I see you tomorrow night lover. Have a great day.” He texted.

Ooo, now that was ominous. A few minutes later he asked, “What time was it before everyone left?”

I answered, then he asked, “And when did the boy finally settle down and go to sleep?”  I answered again.

“Ok, thank you darlin.” He was killing me with his calm methodical questions.  His analytical mind needed data so Master could decide if and what punishment would be a reciprocal response. 

I was flying to be with him the next day.  I didn’t have long to wait to see what the verdict was but it was going to be an interminable wait nonetheless.

I wondered about the punishment.  I  knew I deserved to be punished.  I knew Daddy was weighing the options.  I knew he could let me off because I was tired and he knew it.  I knew he could make it play punishment and we could have fun playing the roles.  I also knew he’d want to be lenient because we’re in this weird limbo because we’re living four states apart right now. 

Secretly, I didn’t want any of those options.  I hadn’t planned this but now that punishment was on the table, I wanted to be truly punished. As a submissive walking the line into slavehood, I want more than anything to feel his power.  I want to feel the yoke on my neck and know I’m being led by a strong hand. 

He picked me up from the airport on Friday and I was giddy to see him and touch him.  Finally, I had my Love in reach again.  He fulfills me.  Me makes my heart whole. Along with my joy was expectation.  What would happen?  He knew it and I knew it. 

We got to the apartment and he sent me to the kitchen for drinks.  He followed. “Arms on the counter in front of you.” Oh god, already? I giggled nervously and bent over the counter, ass out.  I was in a lacey blue dress for him. He threw up the skirt exposing my ass.  His hand caressed my cheeks then he ever so lightly tapped on each cheek with the palm of his hand pulling my skirt back down afterwards.

“You may finish getting the drinks.” He went about putting things away giving me a little smirk in the process. He knew I was waiting and wondering.  He was toying with me. 

(To be continued…)

Homework

So, Daddy gave me a task.  Not the task I never wrote about.  Sorry folks…moving on.  He set me another similar task.  This time, it happened to be on my birthday.

Let me set the scene.  It was a hectic day.  I had family coming to take me to dinner for my birthday.  There was also a work party for me during the day.  All this was wonderful but for some reason I felt harried and stressed.  Probably because the days leading up to my special day were overlong and I was overworked.  My house was trashed and I had no time to clean it for the company that was arriving right after work.  Add the plethora of birthday calls and texts and I was ripe for overload. I know, first world problems. Poor loved thing, how dare they call and write and love me extra well! Sheesh. 

I knew I was on the edge for no apparent reason and blowing my lid at well wishers was bad form so I held it in.  My family all arrived and everyone was talking at me at once, usual family-fest. Right about then Daddy texted.  

“Baby girl, you have homework tonight. You will put in your new anal plug and masturbate for me. Understood?” I read this text while the whirlwind of voices and people whirled around me.  My initial reaction was not submissive at all, lemme tell ya.  Not anywhere near it.  My first thought was, Really? Today of all days?!?

Ok, not my finest submissive moment.  I answered in the affirmative and went back to be being a good hostess all the while I added this news to the jumble in my head. Evil and Angel marked off territory in my mind. 

Daddy is far away and it’s my birthday.  He wants me to feel him today of all days.  

Why am I to perform tasks for his pleasure on my birthday?

It’s not for him you idiot, he wants you to have some fun and some pleasure. 

I’m exhausted now and we haven’t even gone to dinner yet.  How the hell am I going to get rid of this gaggle early enough for this too?

The fight was arduous and ridiculous.  I’d say one side won because it would lend closure to the tale but really they were still at it when I finally got my child to bed and everyone out of the house. 

I laid in bed and thought, okay just close your eyes for a few minutes then do as you’re told. Regardless why he wanted me to or if I wanted to, I’m slave and I must obey.  At that point…you guessed it…I fell sound asleep.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

Time to go back home to my responsibilities. I have had another beautiful and perfect weekend with Daddy and Master.  I call him both now for he has become two.  More than that really.  He is my everything.  My husband-to-be, my muse though he calls me his, my protective Daddy and my stern Master.  

I have not admitted this and granted I’m realizing this as I write it but I need challenge, I need struggle, I can become distracted and bored with less.  My mind is ever active, ever working and ever analyzing.  Daddy and I are more alike in this than I knew. 

He fits me so well.  He told me tonight that I fit him like a glove.  He’s so right. Our bodies fit together but moreso than that, our minds fit together.  He challenges me.  He is relentless in exploring our chemistry.  He finds his way inside my mind, centering my passion, delving to the depths of all that is me.  He worked his way in, he broke the fortress I had become.  With his kind heart, his reprobate swagger, and his force of will all governed by his engineer’s mind he took me and made me his. 

How do I go home tomorrow?  How do I part myself from him when I am so cleaved to him that I feel half a person?  All I want is to shut the world out and live in a dream of service to this man. I want to allow him to debase me, lay me bare, then raise me up from the ashes he created to build me again in the image he sees. 

Sidetracked

Ever start writing with the intention of saying one thing only to end up writing about an entirely different thing? Yeah, me too. That’s what happened in my last post.  I fully had the intention of writing something that fit with the title I gave it. But that’s not what came out.

I think when I haven’t written in a long time all the thoughts and feelings I would have written about are still bottled up inside.  I begin writing after a dry spell and once the first jammed up words are out all the other words come spurting out in all directions.  Yes, the visual there was intentional.  It IS a sex blog after all.

My title Sex, what’s that? was a lame segue from a long hiatus to writing about Daddy’s task for me tonight. But my emotions dragged me off elsewhere. It happens.  

We were family Facetiming and the sneaky man was able to give me direction in code to masturbate tonight for him.  It occurred to me after we disconnected that (1) the man is talented in running multiple layer conversations and (2) it has been a holy hell of a long time since I masturbated well.  

How does that happen?  I think I’m a fairly sex-driven individual.  How does that just turn off when he’s not around?  I know I was work and family focused but sheesh…sad. It’s been several weeks of blah.  I had a couple random vibrator/porn moments but I think I also fell asleep more than once thinking about masturbating without actually having bothered.  Lame. 

So, I have a task to do and I must find my mojo because I was directed to do it well. 

Sex, what’s that?

So, I have been remiss.  I languished in my time with Daddy.  He was here a blissful 9 days, I think.  I wallowed in the touch of him, the nearness of him. I had family and him around me and it was bliss. 

I should have given you all a play-by-play of our days together and then the pain of the inevitable separation but I didn’t.  I felt possessive of my time with him.  I couldn’t waste it writing of it.  Then he was gone and I didn’t have the heart to face it.  

I buried myself in work and parenting and that’s where I’ve been. It’s good really.  The lonely, missing him, feelings get pushed down and my focus narrows.  I have been cranking at work and not sad.  

Like clockwork though, I must write and here I am to face it.  The minute I began writing so came the tears.  Time to find his baby girl and dig her out of her cocoon.  

Fuck.

Objectification

I am drawn to objectification on so many levels. This piece really brings the mental part of it into play. Besos added a predicament as well, Daddy’s favorite. Mmm, I just had to share.

Besos de Cuero

Could you pass the objectification test?

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igor-amelkovich-13

Image – Igor Amelkovich

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“Objectification.

The body will be assessed three times using a variety of distractions. During each test the trainer will take note that on no account does the body move, twitch, sigh, moan, or make any sign of life.

The trainer will use a rod to change the position of the body as required.

After each assessment the body will be flogged for between one and two minutes. The quantity of stokes and harshness of the whipping is at the trainer’s discretion. A generous flogging is customary for the successful completion of a task however if a failure has occurred, a more severe, exemplary punishment, such as a caning, is recommended.

The whipping or caning is a display designed mainly to entertain the gallery and is therefore not included in the judges’ final assessment. As a consequence, during…

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Daddy’s Home

I’m at the airport waiting for his plane.  I’m so excited to have Daddy home!  I get him for a full week and then some.  Pure heaven.  

I’m aching to touch him. I’m aching for lots of things but mainly I desperately want to feel him and be near him. 

😊😊😊😊😊