Long Time No Talk

Hello, it’s me. I think there’s a song that starts that way. I’m overtired but finally in bed. It was a great weekend. We had the family over, which was really fun. We were supposed to go camping but the campground had issues and cancelled. So, we stayed home and BBQ’d for all the would-be campers.

This meant that instead of digging my camping gear out of the attic we switched gears into full house cleaning mode. Mr. D gave the backyard a pick-up and his man cage a full sano. He has a fab enclosed area in the backyard with comfy chairs and a propane glass rock fire table. You know the kind. It’s a great place for him to smoke cigars and friends to come hang out. Yesterday, it was all the family. The man cage was overflowing with all of us. It was a lot of fun.

I spent my morning cleaning the inside of the house, cleaning the carpet, bathrooms, anything and everything that needed cleaning. Whew! Guest-ready! Our place is mostly fine on any given day. If you’d stop by unannounced it wouldn’t be tragic but you know, I like to make it the best I can. I told Mr. D, a party is always a great excuse to clean the house. 😜 I don’t think he thought that was funny.

Mr D got all the fixin’s for carne asada and carne pollo along with grilled veggies. I put together the guacamole and put out everything Mr D bought for an awesome Mexican feast. By the time he was done grilling, everything was ready. One of our guests said, “Wow, you are a great entertaining team!” We are, really. We both love to entertain and take care of our peeps.

It was a really nice party. Sometimes, I feel like I work too much but this felt more relaxed and everyone seemed happy and were enjoying. It was still the same amount of dishes and work but it felt more fun, more family and peaceful. Mr D said he had a great time too and that made me happy.

Today was going to be a relaxing day. The overnight guests went to breakfast with us and then left for home. I was sitting on the couch relaxing but I had so many to-do’s still rumbling around in my head. I decided the front yard finally needed doing. We’ve been in our new place for about ten months and I hadn’t touched it at all yet.

I tore up one whole dead planter and replanted it. I edged it with red brick and weeded it all. Then I planted some new plants. The men helped me with the heavy stuff, yay. It’s not quite done but I planted and used everything I purchased so I’m happy.

I used to have a bad habit of starting major gardening projects, buying plants and then getting discouraged or just not finishing it so the plants would die in the meantime. I stopped doing that many years ago. I only get what I can accomplish in one afternoon or a weekend. I’m pretty proud I’ve learned that lesson. There’s so much more to do in the front but one planter is done and it’s an accomplishment.

Mr D did all the grilling today and cooking the meats for the week, yay. It’s so great when he does this. It makes dinners so much easier all week. We make sides but the main courses are done. Easy peasy. Since I’m a college chick now, time is limited and this helps big time.

So, that was our weekend. I hope yours was great as well. If you have room in whatever prayers or good thoughts you send out into the world, say an extra one for Steelclad in the flood zone. He’s doing important work helping so many people in dire need. A few extra prayers his way would be great.

Goodnight kinky friends.

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Frenzy

He spins me into a wild sexual frenzy. We had sex for hours last night. It was intense, deeply-controlled dominance that led our sexual play. He stirs such passion in me. I ached to have him again right after we were done.

He left this morning and I won't see him for another month in all likelihood. This morning should have been a longing kiss goodbye and me off to work but once again we were at each other. Rutting and needy.

Now I sit at my desk and I am hungry for him. Hungry for his body, starved for the touch of him under my caress, reaching out with my mind to hear his kindred response. He said we are One. He is right about that. My pussy throbs as though his hands are close and his cock available to me now.

I love the frenzy. My body clambers for his. My blood is simmering beneath the surface. Damned the distance, it wants what it wants. It wants the fire and he is the kindling.

Back from Heaven

Okay, so it wasn’t exactly heaven but 7 days in Cancun with Daddy was pretty amazing.  I had him to touch and hold and talk with for a whole week.  That part was divine. 

We were there to be witnesses to Goddess and El Jefe’s ten year vow renewal.  They had family and friends along for the event. Some of the guests were fun, some were crazy, some were kink-friendly and some were downright weird.  All-in-all it was an eventful week.  

The wedding was lovely.  Goddess was beautiful, El Jefe was handsome, my Sweetie was their well-spoken and touching minister.  Our friend Painted Lady was the maid of honor and I was a bridesmaid.  

Daddy and I were responsible for the bachelor and bachelorette parties.  I’ll have to tell you all about them.  They both had a little crazy aspect to them, as it should be.  We had a fun time of it. 

More to come soon.  I just wanted to stop by and say hello! 

Daddy’s Home

I’m at the airport waiting for his plane.  I’m so excited to have Daddy home!  I get him for a full week and then some.  Pure heaven.  

I’m aching to touch him. I’m aching for lots of things but mainly I desperately want to feel him and be near him. 

😊😊😊😊😊

Baby Steps

Writing in the land of missing him has seemed insurmountable. But I must.  Everyday I don’t speak is another day that I’m not connected to myself and to him. 

I heard a lyric this morning that reminds me of how he makes me feel.  There is an unquenchable heat between us.  He lights a fire I knew was there but never had any kindling or oxygen.  

I wanted to share the song with you.  Two weeks until he’s in my arms for a glorious week of time.  My life is measured now in time.  The time until he’s with me. 

Click Here to Listen

Stop and Start

That’s me, the queen of stopping and starting again.   I suppose (so, I tell myself) that dedication does not always come in a long unbroken chain.  We all have fits of downtime, hard time, or breaks in our stride.  Clearly many more are better than I am but I pride myself on (at the very least) my dedication to beginning again. 

So, here I am for the long haul.  I’m dedicated to writing.  I’m dedicated to my Dominant.  I’m dedicated to my son and my family.  Now, what am I going to do?

What I’m going to do has been the paramount question on my mind for months now.  My son’s life is here, my Sweetheart is now in Texas.  What do I do?  When I ask for others opinions, I get them.  But really I get that person’s point of view.  They don’t quite  understand how I am so the help doesn’t seem useful.  I dearly love them all for trying.  But bottom line, I will have to make a decision and no matter which way I go, it will break someone’s heart. 

My Daddy wants me with him and I want to be with him to have our amazing life together.  But to do that I must take my son away from all he’s known and his father.  How can I choose?

Several people say, just take your son, your Ex will just have to deal with it.  That feels so crass and heartless.  The words make me recoil.  Just because he’s an Ex and he did some pretty crappy things while being an active drunk doesn’t mean it’s ok to take his son away.  He got sober.  He’s been sober for years now.  He’s a completely dedicated father.  He is selfish and lacks insight when dealing with his son but is that just cause to lose his son’s proximity?

My Daddy is in Texas now.  He chose a position that will free him from his financial bonds.  It has allowed him to make up a huge chunk of ground he lost during the recession.  He wants financial stability for our future instead of a long struggle.  I totally understand that.  We can buy a house there, a nice house for all of us.

I want to be with him always.  I can’t think of missing him too much or I start crying and I can’t lose myself to that.  I’ve never loved someone like this before.  In all honesty, I loved my Ex but nothing like this.  Daddy and I have a connection unlike any I’ve ever felt.  He compliments me, the real me, like no other.  He is so intelligent he puts me to shame sometimes.  I love our banter.  I love that he picks up on things others do not.  He is funny and lighthearted then dark and intensely sexual. All the facets of him feed the facets in my heart and soul.  He loves my son for who he is.  My son has challenges and is deeply into his puberty at the moment but Daddy sees his goodness and overlooks his growing pains.  

When Daddy moved in we were able to grow in the direction of a nuclear family.  We achieved a routine of sorts in the short time we had together.  Family dinners most nights, playing games, the little things of a complete life. My son was so enamored of it.  So was I.  We were a complete family together.  Our D/s suffered in the transition but I knew we’d eventually figure that out.  We are both focused on not letting that ever slip away. 

Now I must choose.  How do I choose?  Either way my son suffers.  If I stay, he loses out on a nuclear family.  If I go, he will be distanced from his father and will most likely have to go through a legal battle which (knowing his father’s slowness to forgive) could stain their relationship forever. 

Daddy says he will wait for me no matter what it takes.  His level of selflessness and willingness to sacrifice rival any submissive act I could ever offer him.  How can I ask this beautiful man to wait years for me?  

So, there is my torture with all my angst and anxiety.  I have laid myself bare.  Any thoughts you have for us would be welcome.  

Here I Am Again

Starting again and over again. It’s a thing I do.  It’s much better than quitting completely.  Trust me.  That is the worst.  I am consistently inconsistent.  😅

So, what’s happening in your world? Lots, you say?  Mine too. 

Daddy is off to Texas again.  This time for two weeks.  We had trips and holidays, family time and together time.  All during this time we were sick.  Ugh. I am over the whole sick routine.  Off to the Doctor tomorrow because the chest rattle is still around.

I have many great things to tell you so don’t go running off like you do.  Oh wait, that was me.  My bad.

As Daddy says, “Stress is not my friend.” I tend to shut off and internalize when I’m trying to work a problem.  I will explain as I get back into our story.

Love and hugs for now.

Amor