Up All Night

I was told to write yesterday and I failed. It was a truly challenging day with my son. The past few months of the teen years have been almost more than I can handle. He has some emotional problems and I’m spending a lot of time managing his doctors and treatments and, well, it’s really hard. He had anxiety all day yesterday. It was different in that most days there is an episode or challenges but not a whole days worth of it.

Daddy and I had a great adult weekend last weekend. We had time to play. Even though his knee has been hurting him, he still set out all the toys and took care of me. He is so good to me.

I know he wants to hear my thoughts on that play. He was leaving on a plane and sent me a text stating that I must write for him. Not that I had to write something specific but that it had to be yesterday. I accepted the order. I knew he was doing it for me after all. Over the last few months, I’ve realized the submissive part of our relationship is much more something I wanted and not so much something he craved. I think it is fun for him but not necessary.

Daddy wasn’t here to see how all consuming my son was throughout the evening. I ended up falling asleep with my son tucking me in and going back to his room. He was finally calm and I was out. I completely lost focus of Daddy’s command.

In the morning, I woke to Daddy being very upset with me…disappointed, he texted. I broke. The man gives me one command in months and I failed completely. He may not need a submissive but I know he wants me to write. He drops pointed comments often enough that I know how he misses it. I felt my heart drop to my feet. I love him so much and yet I can’t do a simple thing when he asks.

I didn’t even know how to respond. You can’t make proper amends by apologizing again for a repeated bad behavior. Who cares to hear that? No one.

So, here I am writing. I spent my one night alone in the house cleaning everything I never have time to clean. I’m so tired of not getting those things done. It was cathartic. At least the place smells better.

So, one thing at a time. Today I write, tomorrow I’ll sleep.

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Merry Christmas to Me

A post from Daddy:

Home, Honey-dos, new house, Holidays, kid, and roommate….  Doesn’t make for many opportunities to demand Service.  Last night My Slut and I had alone time for the first time in a very long time.  We worked long and hard on the house preparing for company and the Holidays and after said day we turned in.   She massaged my legs with lotion, I asked her if she wanted a spanking and she said she always wanted a spanking.

I told her to remove her pants and lay face down on the bed.   I laid across her legs at the knees and massaged her ample ass.   Warming to my touch I kissed it and started to lightly tap her bum.  Rapid tapping ensued though not hard.  Still warming and alternatively rubbing to excite the flesh.  Her ass was glowing warm and I slapped her ass and rubbed away the sting.  Over and Over and Over I slapped and rubbed, eliciting gasps and moans equally.  I was as mesmerized by the gasps as her moans.  My cock was hard and dripping pre-come.    I used my fingertips to circle and trace the curves of her ass and dug my fingers into her back.

I spanked her – needing her gasps and squeals as she hugged the pillows.  I was not gentle but was not completely unkind in my ministrations.  Her ass stung and she squirmed.  I wanted her.  I always want her but I needed her.  I pulled my palm paddle and told her to count.  One Daddy, the sting was intense.  Two Daddy, face in the pillow.  Three Daddy, I could her hear tears.  Four Daddy, Eight Daddy, and Ten Daddy and I heard her relief just before I gave the Eleventh…   On it went.  She held it together but barely and when I gave her number twenty she was putty.   I shook off the paddle and caressed her with my fingertips.  Then rubbed her ass vigorously.

I shifted and demanded she open her legs.  Lift your ass I commanded and she did.  I spit on her puckered chocolate star and buried my face and tongue in her ass.  She was bucking.  I slid a finger in her sex and my tongue in her ass.  She begged for me to fuck her.

Roll over I said and I tongued her clit.  Licking it hard and in long strokes followed by tender touches and the tip of my tongue.  I could not wait another second and I slammed my cock into her!   She cooed.  Her eyes were in the back of her head and I was slowly pulling from the depths of her sex as her hands pulled at me to pound her again.  I slowly took what was rightfully mine and dared her to challenge me.  Our eyes met and we were one.  Not in some corny BS way – we were in the moment and all I ever wanted was in her eyes.

We rutted again and it was hard and animalistic and I quickly filled her with my come.  I was sated; wrapped in her embrace and basking – I was finally home.  Truly home with my Baby Girl, My Slut, and My Muse.  Merry Christmas to me.

Home Again

I have wonderful news to share. Mr. D interviewed for a job here and got it. He will be coming home to me! After a year of flying back and forth to see each other we will be in the same home sharing the same bed every night. Yay yay yay!

I loved many parts of this year but I’m so glad it is coming to an end. I loved going to visit Daddy. I loved the dedicated alone time we had when I flew there. It was like our own BDSM hideaway. I will miss that. I will miss our new state and the people there. It was a beautiful state with friendly people. I loved that we toured around like tourists together.

I think it is the pain slut in me when I say I’ll miss missing him. I hated leaving at the end of every trip but I liked feeling those feelings. Odd to say that I liked my tears but they did show me how deeply I love him and how anchored my submission to him is in my heart.

So, it will take some time and planning but he is coming home!

New Orders

I was at work the Wednesday before last and Daddy began texting me. He was abrupt and a little demanding. I was wrapping up some work and just heading to lunch with a girlfriend who was waiting outside my office.

Slut. What are your plans this weekend? I may have an assignment for you.

I had absolutely no plans for the weekend coming up which I told him. Usually I have something planned but I was going into a full week without my son and was a little bereft at the idea.

Ok. Your assignment will be to take care of someone who needs attention. Can you do that for me? Can you step out on a limb and trust me that it will be a good thing? No sex is involved unless you show intent or desire but initially on your terms.

As I headed out to my waiting girlfriend I felt a little frazzled and now I had Daddy sending me to a complete stranger? What is this new task? Who was this person? It had to be someone I know…right?

"Will you do this for me baby?"

"Yes Daddy, I will."

"Nervous baby? Anxious?" I was. I had my girlfriend right there who is a chatterbox on a good day and while she was talking away my mind was completely distracted by Daddy's task.

"I thought you might be. Are you turned on at all? You didn't even ask if it's a male or female." He wrote.

I quickly replied that I would serve who ever he wanted me to serve, male or female. One, I trusted him and two, he said sex would be my choice.

All through lunch I wondered about this task of his. Who could it be? Would he really send me someone to please sexually?

He sent one final text during lunch, "I won't keep you then. But you will have to do better this weekend. I need the attention."

I quickly replied in the affirmative and finished lunch with my girlfriend. I usually do not look at my phone at all when with friends. I want to give our friendship my full attention but Daddy had me spun.

After lunch I saw a text that had probably been waiting for a long while. "I tell you I'm coming for the weekend and that's all I get?" Wait! What??

It was Daddy. He was the person he wanted me to serve. He was coming home for the weekend! I was so surprised and ecstatic. He had been playing a little prank on me. He had booked travel and had it all arranged. I am one lucky girl.

Lifestyle Characters

As we move around in this lifestyle Mr. D and I have taken on many personae. Purists would shun our behavior, I have no doubt.  

In exploring our interests and one another we’ve each tried on a few different characters. They all fall on our own distinct side of the slash but they each relate to the others differently. Mr. D is and always will be dominant. There is no changing that immutable fact. No matter what persona he dons it is decidedly in the lead.  

I am always and primarily submissive. There is no changing that part of who I am. It is a permanent part of me.  

As we began to explore, Mr. D loved the Daddy/baby girl dynamic. I had never experienced it before. I understood it and was willing to try. I knew a baby girl was submissive so felt I could take this on. Fast forward a few years and I truly enjoy being a baby girl. 

The Daddy role suits Mr. D perfectly. He is always watchful and taking care of me. Even when he’s the one to hurt me he’s the first to make sure I’m okay. Even when we have plain vanilla sex he makes sure I’m ok afterwards.  I love being his baby girl.  I love how he considers me in all he does, how he plans ahead, and how me protects me. It took putting me into a vulnerable baby girl mindset to open me as deeply as he has. I trust him more than I’ve trusted anyone with my heart and my body. 

As we have grown in our dynamic Mr. D has asked me about the desires in my submissive heart. I’ve told him of my secret dream of being slave or kajira. I crave the intensity and the full immersion of that role. Something about me wants the ultimate test. I want to be his prized possession, his greatest asset. I want to be owned by him. I ache to serve and relinquish all of myself to him. It is not easy. In fact it can be very hard and for some reason I crave that. The more stern he is and the more demanding, the faster I slip into subspace. Why? We’ve explored that too. No matter the why, the reason it works is because it is a release and a challenge for me. In those moments of deep service all else disappears, all that remains is his desire. That pinpoint of darkness, that razor’s edge of focus is my happy place. In those moments I feel like we merge into one whole.

Before I left home on Friday to come see him, Mr. D texted me that Stern Master would be taking control this visit. He told me to be ready. He said he had been too lenient for far too long. “Be ready,” his text said. I knew what that meant. Daddy would be put away and a more rigid and controlling personality would take his place. Stern Master doesn’t let me get away with anything. He wants and he takes. He does not protect as Daddy does, he expects service and expects it with no excuses. 

Is this Mr. D’s natural personality? Yes and no. It is not the primary one. His primary is Daddy. In his most relaxed and most comfortable, he is Daddy. When his darkness takes over, he is Master. Does this mean Master is any less him? No. Less comfortable perhaps but no less him. 

My baby girl, submissive, slave, slut and whore all serve him. No matter the name, no matter the inflection of voice, when he calls, I answer. When he commands, I obey. 

Exposed

The first night in Cancun, Mr. D greeted me at the door of the hotel.  I came in on a later flight and took a shuttle to the hotel.  

As we sat with the Concierge to get my key to our room, Mr. D told me, “I am a little drunk.  I got El Jefe drunk at the swim-up pool bar today.  I am sunburnt and we made ALL the friends.” That’s my man.  One day in Cancun and he made friends with everyone and trashed himself and his best friend.  Love him!  He is all out sometimes and I love that about him. 


He walked me to our room showing me the hotel and then opening the door to our perfect oasis for the week.  The room was a vision in tropical white. White linens, white leather couches, white bar and white curtains.  The room had a patio out to the pool, a sauna tub and the shower I already mentioned.  The bar was a full bar.  


It was magical and we had it all to ourselves for a full week.  Life was good! It was late but I was hungry from a long day of travel. We ordered room service for me then relaxed on the bed. One thing led to another and Daddy soon had his face buried in my crotch.  We hadn’t seen each other in a month. He had me so turned on.  At about the point I was writhing on the bed he crawled up to whisper in my ear, his hand taking over where his mouth had been. 

“I want to fuck my slut but room service is coming soon. Maybe I’ll have my little whore answer the door naked.” I moaned as he made me hotter and wetter with his hands and his taunts. 

“Yes, I think I will have you answer the door just like this.  Or maybe,” He pulled his shorts down then and took out his cock. “I’ll make you walk to the door with my cum dripping out of you like a dirty whore should.”  With that he fucked me hard and fast all the while my mind is reeling from the thought of exposing myself to the room service guy soon to arrive on our doorstep. Daddy knows how to twist me up so tightly.

I shuddered with the pleasure of his cock pounding me. I looked into his slightly drunken eyes and thought he might be drunk enough to make me do it.  Would I answer the door naked and used? The unanswered question plunked around in my head as he fucked me.

Then, the knock came at the door. I’m sure my eyes widened as round as saucers.  Daddy pulled his cock out of me and pulled up his shorts. “Don’t move.” He said. His voice hard as nails.  I thought, he’s going to bring the guy into the room while I’m naked on the bed. I knew I couldn’t move but at the last second threw the sheet over my bare ass so I was partially covered. 

Daddy walked back into the room alone with a tray of food. I breathed a sigh of relief until, “I didn’t say you could cover yourself.” Damn, caught.

Soon, I was on the ottoman at the end of the bed and he finished fucking me in that position.  We love ottomans. So, that was my welcome to Mexico.

Daddy’s Home

I’m at the airport waiting for his plane.  I’m so excited to have Daddy home!  I get him for a full week and then some.  Pure heaven.  

I’m aching to touch him. I’m aching for lots of things but mainly I desperately want to feel him and be near him. 

😊😊😊😊😊