For years I struggled to understand how I fit with other people. I loved people in all their weirdness but I stood apart as if separate. I was afraid. I felt timid and vulnerable. I met a boy and fell in love. I took care of him and felt happy. Over the years, I took care of more and more of our lives. I did what he wouldn’t or couldn’t do. I was deeply trapped by the time I realized he was alcoholic and I was co-dependent.
I knew something was wrong. I looked for answers. Why did I fall into this trap? I’m smart, I should have seen. Is it wrong to take care of those you love? I found that there was a place and a way that called to me. The place was the kinky lifestyle and the way was through submission.
Through Alanon, I found out how not to enable someone to use me and become sicker themselves. Through kink I learned how submission and service can be fulfilling ways to embrace my chosen self without it being unhealthy.
I spent time learning about the lifestyle timidly from a distance. I spent more time online learning about the lifestyle and my own submissiveness with some truly amazing people and a special Dom who ultimately helped me find my freedom.
Finally, I took a leap of faith and started meeting people in the local lifestyle. I met a couple and helped them fulfill their fantasies while they helped me open the door to my own desires.
After that amazing experience, I found that I ached for my own experiences to begin. I had found love in submission from afar and kink in submission in the flesh but it was time to truly embrace this intriguing lifestyle for myself.
I didn’t know it at the time but there was another person out there searching for his own counterpart. After despairing that there wasn’t anyone locally I would trust with my submission, Mr. D swept into my life with a suddenness that still astounds me. From the moment he first wrote to me until now, our connection has felt natural and so very deep. He is the real thing, live and in person. With him, my timidity melted away. We dove into our roles as Dominant and submissive with shocking immediacy. Every moment since has been intoxicatingly passionate and all recorded here.
Welcome to our kinky world.
6 thoughts on “About Enigmatic Amor”
The price of admission was to ultimately find your freedom.
Paid in full Sweetie…!
From afar and always….smiles.
Thank you for always being in my corner cheering me on. Hug and love. 🙂
I feel your struggles and I am sad to hear you go through it, but happy you have found your constant. I am going to go through your blog now. I am quite excited to. I hope you find something useful in my own blog. Take care 🙂
Hello Sir, thank you so much for your compassionate response. I really enjoyed the post that led me to your blog and look forward to reading more. Very nice to meet you…virtually. 🙂
I have heard this kind of tale from so many women but I am delighted you were able to find your true self. I would like to say Thank you for sharing your own story and may you find real happiness.
Thank you kitten and thank you for commenting.