I was responding to a comment and something came up that I thought I’d bring to a more public place for discussion. Those of us that write a blog all have certain things we do as part of this blogging way of life. It’s not just write, publish and reap millions of readers’ love and adoration. Is it? I mean, if it is for you that’s insanely good. Move along, there’s nothing for you here.

Like I said in my last post, this is a blogging platform not specifically a social one. If you want it to become a social one you have to work at it. Most followers at the beginning to middle stages of a blog are other blog writers. We’re interested and we’re here a lot more than general readers. It just stands to reason that we are each other’s audience to a great extent. What that means is that there is reciprocation needed. You can’t just write and move on with your day if you want to build a community.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read a blog post about someone’s guilt related to not reading all their followers’ posts. I feel that guilt all the time. I’m sure many of you do too…I’ve read it. I’ve gone back and forth with this guilt. I’ve tried to read through and comment on every subscription email I receive on your posts. I’ve tried to have a laissez-faire attitude of “I’ll read the ones that really interest me,” because I can’t read them all. Then I’ve fallen completely off the wagon and deleted them all in one swift fire sale of frustration. I haven’t found the sweet spot of following.

My question is what do you do? How do you handle the flow? How do you build community? I see some folks who have succeeded. They have a nice group of consistent commenters and they are having a grand time. I post a comment in the midst of their conversation and it makes me smile. I feel the glow coming from their light.

I know not everyone has the same goal. People blog for many different reasons. My own reasons vacillate back and forth. I write because I love to write. I write for my Dominant. He loves to read and it thrills me to thrill him. This is a way I can serve him and show my love. He likes to use my writing to assess how I did with his choice of scenes. He is a process thinker, an engineer. He needs input and I don’t always want to talk it all through. I love talking to him but I don’t always volunteer information, so I write and it’s

another way to communicate.

I am a social person and a service person. My submission to Daddy has a big service element. My work and parenting also have a service element. This means that I don’t do anything in a vacuum or just for myself. Which leads me to realize that I need to give weight to that in my writing endeavors too. I thrive on feedback. I thrive in a community. When the community or service aspect of my writing dwindles, I stop wanting to write as much.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on building a blogging community, how you are a good follower or why you write. Thank you to all who read and follow me. You are truly my lifeblood here.

17 thoughts on “Following

  1. It’s such a challenge…the reading and the writing and the following.
    My motto is “find your tribe and love them hard”
    I have a few faithful commenters and if they’ve taken the time to read my posts, I make sure I make time for theirs. I keep up with them. Some have morphed into the friends outside of WP. It’s my very small community but nonetheless, it feels like a great big crazy family. Just how I love it.

  2. I write purely because I love to write. That other’s read what I write is a bonus. although I cannot read every post of those I follow, I do read as many as I can and I try to pick different ones all the time. I also make sure that I comment on other’s blogs and answer anyone who bothers to take the time to comment on mine. I don’t have a massive blog, but I enjoy it nonetheless.

  3. missagathaarmstrong

    i started mine to talk to Master. Well not to talk so much, but i had to have a way to tell Him how i felt – really without discussion. i think sometimes there is too much discussion and sometimes it is purely how you feel….

    i was coaxed out of privacy by a girl that well – i no longer even think about her – she was nasty and quite cruel in the end… but she did open up a whole world for me. For always i thought my longings were all my own and no other self respecting human could possibly desire such things – then i met heavenly creatures like yourself.

    i learnt that i am not alone in my naughtyness and in my heart. i have found such amazing people and i am so very proud to call you all my friend..

    As far as reading and writing – For the most part i have been good – but these past six months have been so very hard for me that i have only been able to dip in and out – but i have kept writing for Master.

    i have read, but commented little, mainly because of .. sometimes the painful longing is just too much… but i also know that people understand.

    I have never in my life been more grateful to such a “community” as this. Master gave life to this blog, and then His permission to publish openly. He comments rarely, and i am sure He does not read everything. But He does read me, and studies me – and You and others have given me a life – a life with my Most Beloved Master.

    i love your words – dear one – i thank you greatly for them – always x

    1. Thank you so much for sharing Miss Agatha. I love that we both write for our Master and I too found a whole world of kink and fulfilled desires through blogging. It is truly amazing stuff. I love the sharing and hearing how other people struggle just as much as I do. It is so nice, a wonderful sharing. Thank you dear one. Xoxo

  4. When I started the blog – it was a place to release my D/s. Purely for me. M, didn’t know it existed until he went looking. I developed it about a year before 50 Shades was coming out in the Theaters. There were a lot of people exploring their BDSM on blogs at that point. Many have disappeared, lives taking over, death, moving to Instagram, people being “outed”, moving on to other things. My followers are up, my views are down — but as M and I discussed, the blog is still for me. My place to release thoughts.

    I used to be able to read daily…now it has become bi-weekly or monthly. I know that my reading blogs prompts others to read mine — but I just can’t do it, time-wise.

    So, I remind myself what I’ve told other people, “Do what you can, when you can for yourself. Someone, somewhere will come on your ride and if one person who shares their time with you, that is generous and more than enough.”

  5. Darth Deviant

    I’ve rarely felt the need for community. I tend to not fit into groups very well. My writing reflects that. I’m sarcastically caring… romantically perverted… ingeniously stupid… lazily frantic. My readers tend to be people who know me in real life (girlfriends and long time friends).

    But why I write… it’s to be me. At my job, I have to be a drone and say, “Yes, sir. Yes, ma’am. I’ll follow the plan exactly.” So I write so I can be more, “Fuck you rules and society and expectations!” It’s a release, and one that others don’t often understand.

    Very few people follow me consistently. And that’s okay. Very few people comment on my posts. And that’s okay too. When I see that people have read my stuff, I’m excited… and when I see that people don’t read something, I don’t care.

    But once in awhile, you find someone who willing sends you a picture of her boob and nipple for your birthday. And you don’t even know her. And that makes my craziness worth it.

    Hope that answers your inquiry 😀

    1. Sarcastically caring and romantically perverted are unique qualities that don’t tend towards mainstream, very true. Those are some of the qualities that bring me here, though. I love crazy, unique folks. I absolutely agree that this is a way to be free. I love it for that.

      Plus, where else can you flash a boob or a nipple simply to make someone smile? (You gave me a great laugh this morning, I totally forgot about that, lol.)

  6. I have been a blog reader for a very long time. I started my blog a few years ago to see if it would help relieve some inner turmoil. The blogs I read claimed that it did. Perhaps it’s worked … I don’t know. Now I write (when I can find the time and initiative) primarily to entertain myself and (hopefully) for the entertainment of some devotees. That part is a lot of fun. I also read lots of blogs still, but sometimes they pile up and I’m a “late” reader (like here now). But eventually I get caught up.

    1. All great reasons for blogging. Funny how our human cycle is to be excited for something initially and then slack off at some point down the road. Seems a running theme. I guess it’s the balance of life.

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