Last night we talked about duality. MrD mentioned that he feels a duality towards me and I realized he had put into words something that had been on the edges of my mind. He said that sometimes he wants to hold me and love me and protect me but other times he just wants to take what he wants without asking or caring what I want. I have a similar duality. I love how I feel in his arms and how I love him but I also want to be debased by him, be his little slut who will do anything to please.
During our play last night, MrD got very rough. We had already had sex earlier, already felt the tiredness in our bones. Once he started and I knew where he was going, I ached for it. The harder and rougher he got the more I craved. I wanted everything he gave.
Once he was inside me he began to slap my breasts. He made me hold them up so that they were towering between us. I am a big girl, so I am amply proportioned there. He placed my hands on each side of my breasts pushing them up and together so that they were presented to him. He slapped one and then the other. As soon as he heard my gasps of pain he would thrust deep inside me. The pain and the pleasure spiraled within me and I couldn’t stop the gasping and crying out with each slap and thrust combination.
He told me while he was deep inside me that I was his, I was his slut, his girl, that I was only for him. I could see the sadism darkening his eyes and I was entranced by it. I swear, in that moment, I was under a spell. The pain was pushing me forward, pushing me to want to be every dirty thing he wanted of me. I had no sense of fear, all I felt in that moment was need to be what he desired, to be that slut that would take it all and do whatever he asked.
His fire and his base need to abuse me threw me into a whirlwind of shocking pleasure. I was incinerated by his thrusts deeper and harder even as the pain in my breasts pulled the gasps from me ever more frequently. I met his thrusts with my hips and moved with him. His growl penetrated the sensations, “Good girl, ride your Daddy.”
As our thrusts got more and more fervent, he asked me what I wanted. I was surprised at my answer, “You know what I want.” Honestly, in that moment I felt so completely overtaken by the thrusting that I couldn’t put a thought together to speak. But Daddy was in charge and wouldn’t put up with that. He said, “No, what do you want?”
I groaned and finally found the words, “Come on me Daddy, I want you to come on me!”
A few thrusts later he pulled out and covered my belly with his fluids. I reached down and rubbed them into my belly, my skin. It felt like my reward, my gift for accepting all the intensity of the moments before.
I am his desire and I will submit to his every whim. I wish to ride the waves of his duality and find mine matching it each step of the way. From the beast to the man, I will be his muse, his girl, his slut until he tells me otherwise.